Saturday, January 29, 2011

think spring.

Okay, I'm fantasizing here. It's that time of year where I'm ready to kick winter in the ass and tell it to get the hell outta town. I want to go outside. There, I said it. The notoriously inside person said she wants to go outside. Unless a bee or other insect comes near me, then I might change my mind.

I took these pictures last year after I planted some of my favorite flowers - Gerbera Daisies. Ironically, they all died. Turns out, I know nothing about gardening. What a shock! :)


Finally!! A day where we could go outside! I pushed Kalli in the swing awhile, we kicked the ball around and she had lots of fun climbing and going down the slide. It felt so good to finally be able to get a little fresh air and feel the sunshine :)

Friday, January 28, 2011

happiness is....


Kalli loves frozen blueberries. I get her the fresh ones and she won't touch them, they have to be frozen. Tonight she kept asking for more.... I said "Who wants more blueberries?" and she would raise her hand and say "Meeee!!!"

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

my girl.

I just love having a daughter. She wants me to paint her nails and curl her hair. She wants to "sit in you yap" (sit in your lap) and read books. Tonight she squeezed me tight and said "Mommy, I like you. You're my friend." It almost made me cry. What a loving little soul :) I'm so lucky.

I just thought she looked sweet in this pic. What's funny is when she was a baby her little legs were so fat that we could barely get her in and out of her bumbo. Now she just fits right in there. She likes it more than her brother!

Monday, January 24, 2011

just love.

My mom came over today for a much needed visit. She came with tulips, my favorite! Thanks, Mom!! She and Jim visited New Orleans and she brought Kalli back a mask that she had some fun with tonight. Oh how I love my happy little girl :)

Saturday, January 22, 2011

fresh pea baby food.

This was my first attempt at making baby food and I have to say that it went quite well. I started with a bag of fresh peas, boiled them, pureed them in my magic bullet (I finally have a use for this thing), strained them to get rid of the skin and voila! Baby food. Fresh and home made. I didn't make much for my first time, it was really just an experiment. But now I know I can do it. Sweet potatoes next!

Friday, January 21, 2011

the face of a sick baby.

Would you believe me if I told you that Parker has been up almost all night with a fever? He's sick, my poor lil' dude. But this morning I got him cleaned up, slathered him in lotion (for his eczema) and put on some fresh clothes and I think he feels much better. I just snapped a couple of pics of him - and he's still my happy little guy.

Everyone in the house has been sick except me. I guarantee if you tookpic of me today I would not look this bright eyed! :)

Sunday, January 16, 2011

cute overload.

All out of focus. I had some setting issues. But still an adorable capture. Putting Parker in his new Bumbo - he loved the new perspective.

Monday, January 10, 2011


Today while I was snapping a few pics of Parkers eczema I got this sweet shot. Enjoy :)

oh how I love thee.

My fabulous new camera bag = love.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

oh my boy.

When I look at my sweet, mellow, happy lil' dude I wonder how I got so lucky? I have two great kids that are my world. Both healthy and strong. I'm battling cabin fever and had a rough "parenting" day on Saturday. But, as I sit here and reflect on my weekend, I still feel incredibly blessed.

Parker is so cute. We have two little play mirrors and each time I put him in front of one he gets two expressions - first, shock. It's like he is saying "Hello, there, baby!" and then happiness. He grins at himself. Says a few little baby babble things, then gets bashful, shys away and then smiles again. It's pretty much the sweetest thing ever :-)

Thursday, January 6, 2011

work in progress.

I was thinking to myself today, as I often do, about my goals in life. I realize that some goals I set for myself in the past were never met. Do I consider that failure? Eh, not really. I guess it depends on how you look at it. Sometimes, goals aren't met because paths change. People change. Opportunities arise (and sometimes disappear). Some goals aren't met because new, better ones, are realized.

I guess we are all just a work in progress. No one ever stays the same, even if they try. Even those who put little effort into changing, will at least evolve a little bit. I don't mean I've never failed, because I really have. I've lost. I've won. I've come first and I've also come dead last. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, but in the end, it's only with yourself. I heard that once and it's always stuck with me.

I guess I've been doing some soul searching lately. It seems like I get caught up in the everyday things and time will pass and I sort of lose sight of what I'm working towards. I lose sight of me. I think a lot of people can say they've been there. Especially mothers. Everyone else comes first. It's quite selfless really, but also a tad self destructive. I think you have to take time to think about you, what's important in your life, what you want for yourself, not just your family. Set some goals. Try to reach them. Feel accomplished when you do. Fail - sometimes you learn more than when you succeed. Discover things about yourself you didn't know. I seem to always discover things about myself...and sometimes they're quite surprising!

I want to always be growing. Always be learning. Always evolving. I am going to try to set little goals for myself each day. Some will be big, some will be small. I think I always perform better - no matter the circumstance - when I have a specific end in mind. Something I am working towards. I need direction. I crave it.

Right now, my goal is sleep. So, off to bed I go. Tomorrow is a new day. Isn't that just the greatest thing? Oh, and thankfullness. If that's even a word. That's one of my new goals too - I'm gonna really be thankful for all the wonderful things I have in my life. Like my dad used to always say - always be looking forward. And right now, I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

playing house.

Tonight I played dollhouse with Kalli. It was so sweet to watch her dig through all the accessories - each one excited her. "The bed!! I'll put the mommy in the bed." ....and then "Look, mommy! The babies! The mommy will hold them". I wish I could wrap her little munchkin voice up and put it somewhere so later when she's older I can go back and listen to it. I just think it's the cutest thing.

Maybe I was wearing mom goggles tonight, but I was so impressed by how she arranged the items in her dollhouse. Everything I put in there she was like "no, no, it goes here, mommy" and she'd move it. It was so...correct. For all I know this is normal for a two year old, but I felt really proud that she knew how to set it up.

Tonight when I wrote the post to my dad on his b'day it made me cry a little. She was so concerned for me. She told Joe "My mommy, she's cryin'" and she came and hugged me. She was a bit confused but she still tried to comfort me. It made my heart swell and I had to choke back even more tears! Oh, my little girl, how I love you so.

to my dad.

Today you would have been 63 years old. You would have been a "golden oldie" as you and mom used to call it. I miss you every day and wish so much that you could know my children. Most of all, thank you for being such a good dad. I love you...Happy Birthday.

I've posted my favorite picture of my dad. Because it was so him. He loved animals and all living things and he just had a way of picking something up and looking at it....just appreciating it. I loved that about him.

new friends.

My old friend Pam came over today with her new baby, Max. He's about 4 weeks younger than Parker. I know they'll be great buddies as they grow. It was cute seeing them together.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

this is my year.

I have high goals for 2011. I want to lose 70 lbs, get healthy and kick butt out in the yard playing and chasing my littles this summer. Normally I find myself parked in the shade just watching because it's so exhausting to chase a toddler around outside for any length of time. I had to admit to myself that I'd lost control of my weight and that it was high time to do something about it. I'm sure I'll have bad days here and there, but I'm learning that if you have a bad day that it can be just that. One bad day. Don't let it spill over into the next and the next and the next day. I am very inspired by some of my good friends who have lost large amounts of weight by completely restructuring their lifestyle and how they view and deal with food. Stacey and Amanda - you girls are my inspiration!

I went through my entire house and threw away all the junk and treats left from xmas. It was very liberating. I had no idea how good it would feel to throw away a box of candy canes! This is my first week and I already feel better.

I also have high work goals. I know I have a baby at home, so I'm developing a "work smarter not harder" strategy for 2011 and I'm hoping that we can really take off with our sites this year. We have survived (and thrived) during the recession, so I see no reason why we can't take this thing to the max. Please, share our sites with all the little girls you know. Kids love playing dress up and this is the "modern" way to do it!

Here are our sites:

Sky Breeze Games

Dress Up Craze

Glam Dress Up

Anyway, I'm really excited about what lies ahead. So many firsts to look forward to with Parker. Watching Kalli grow and learn new things each day. Maybe start house hunting a little here and there. I'm ready for all of it! I'm going to be a better me....and I can't wait!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

love him.

When I was pregnant with Parker I wondered if I could love him as much as I loved Kalli. Seems so silly now. I can't imagine not seeing his gummy little grin every morning or watching him grow (like a weed).

I can honestly say that I can enjoy him more than I did Kalli. The first time around you're so anxious, worried, uptight. This time I am much more relaxed and I consciously decided when he was born to soak up every minute because I'm pretty sure he's my last. It flies by and I know that soon he'll be wanting to explore the world - crawling, first steps, walking, running! It will be hard to catch him and pull him up into my lap.

Mostly I'm so thankful we decided to have another baby because of the bond that is growing between my two little munchkins. I just love how they love each other. Parker is completely fascinated by her - he strains his little neck following her every move. She, in turn, dotes on him, reads to him, shares things with him. It fills me with mother pride and makes my heart swell. What can I say....I'm in love with both of them.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

a bit about motherhood.

Ah, my little Kalli bug. She's smart and sweet, yet sassy and assertive. She runs around our house constantly like a little bundle of energy. At the same time she'll grab her princess blanket, snuggle up in your lap and watch a movie with you. She will come up to me, grab my leg, hand, whatever and say "I've got you!" - it's just about the sweetest thing. Every morning she runs to the window and says "Sunshine! Wake up!!" - what a little character.

I'm not going to pretend it's all rainbows and unicorns, because it's not. Motherhood is a dirty, gritty, mean, hard, full on job. Of course it has it's rewards, but it is the single hardest and most exhausting thing you'll ever do. I never really understood that about parenthood until I had my own children. The minute I had my first baby I had an instant respect for my own mother - I now knew why she did all the things she did. She scolded me when I was bad so that I'd learn right from wrong, she praised me when I did well so that I'd be encouraged towards more success, she loved me when I was sad and helped me when I was down because she wanted my life to be happy and prosperous. She has lifted me up more times than I can count. She is the most artistically inspiring person I've ever known. She has an indescribable talent - so creative, her art is amazing. And there's little touches of it in everything she does. I know now what she means when she tells me that she can't be happy if I'm hurting.

Mothers are an amazing breed. The good ones, anyway. I've learned so much about myself in the past three years (I really do think it begins with pregnancy). I've made so many mistakes and had so many successes. It's all a bit confusing at times. I always wonder if I'm doing the right thing and lots of times when I'm not it's instantly obvious! But, you just keep learning. Just keep going. I think the biggest thing I didn't know was the level of sacrifice you make for your kids. But, you do it willingly and selflessly. So different from when you were "single" - it's just part of the job.

I look at my daughter and see how loving she is. She is sweet and generous. She whispers "I love you, Baby Parker" to her brother when she doesn't know you're watching. She gently strokes his hair and tells him "you're okay, mommy will pick you up" when he cries. She is so excited to share her successes with him - "Look Baby Parker! I painted a sunshine! LOOK!!"

So no matter how much mommy guilt I have, how much uncertainty I have in my ability as a mother (some days), or how I worry if I'll raise good and kind children, when I see that I know I must be doing something right.


It was warm today, so Joe took the opportunity to go out to our shed and get the brand new excersaucer for Parker. It was assembled within a few minutes (with help from big sister). His feet don't touch the ground and we had to shove blankets around him to keep him steady, but he was pretty thrilled with it. He's still a bit too young, but I have a feeling he's just going to love it as he grows.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

oh em gee.

Most people would probably not want to post a picture like this. But, it's my life, and this is part of it. I'd say that at least 90% of the time when Kalli is playing in the living room it looks like this. It drives me nuts. But, as soon as it gets picked up she drags something out and five mins later we're back to this.

Anyway, this is New Years day, about 9:00 am. Some coloring, snacking and watching cartoons was going on, and this is exactly what it looked the raw :) I can't imagine this times two! We MUST have a bigger house by the time Parker can drag stuff out of his room. We are in desperate need of a playroom.