Thursday, January 6, 2011

work in progress.

I was thinking to myself today, as I often do, about my goals in life. I realize that some goals I set for myself in the past were never met. Do I consider that failure? Eh, not really. I guess it depends on how you look at it. Sometimes, goals aren't met because paths change. People change. Opportunities arise (and sometimes disappear). Some goals aren't met because new, better ones, are realized.

I guess we are all just a work in progress. No one ever stays the same, even if they try. Even those who put little effort into changing, will at least evolve a little bit. I don't mean I've never failed, because I really have. I've lost. I've won. I've come first and I've also come dead last. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, but in the end, it's only with yourself. I heard that once and it's always stuck with me.

I guess I've been doing some soul searching lately. It seems like I get caught up in the everyday things and time will pass and I sort of lose sight of what I'm working towards. I lose sight of me. I think a lot of people can say they've been there. Especially mothers. Everyone else comes first. It's quite selfless really, but also a tad self destructive. I think you have to take time to think about you, what's important in your life, what you want for yourself, not just your family. Set some goals. Try to reach them. Feel accomplished when you do. Fail - sometimes you learn more than when you succeed. Discover things about yourself you didn't know. I seem to always discover things about myself...and sometimes they're quite surprising!

I want to always be growing. Always be learning. Always evolving. I am going to try to set little goals for myself each day. Some will be big, some will be small. I think I always perform better - no matter the circumstance - when I have a specific end in mind. Something I am working towards. I need direction. I crave it.

Right now, my goal is sleep. So, off to bed I go. Tomorrow is a new day. Isn't that just the greatest thing? Oh, and thankfullness. If that's even a word. That's one of my new goals too - I'm gonna really be thankful for all the wonderful things I have in my life. Like my dad used to always say - always be looking forward. And right now, I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

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